It's time to grow, expand, and let go!

October 12, 2009

Black men, the penis…. brief version

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , , , , , — timetokeepitreal @ 7:39 pm

Originally, I wasn’t planning on updating tonight. The Phils are on and I’m rooting for my team but a post on Faith’s blog (Acts of Faith in Love and Life) reminded me of the next topic I was going to approach: Black Men and their penis. This is the brief overview, I’ll probably go in depth in the future.

No other men in the world has championed their penis like African-American Black Men. Latino men have the stereotype of being the “Latin lover,” but they aren’t tied into their penis like black men are. From your regular cookie cutter BW hating rap song to your R&B “lemme get yo panties, gurl” song to movies and books, BM are lauded for supposedly having the biggest penises on earth. Many times as a young BW, I’ve had random BM come up to me from when I was in high school through college to now, telling me how big their penis is and how good it’ll feel, etc. It was like their “big” penis was supposed to get them into my life and into my bed.

Fact: Most men are on average 5-7 inches long when erect. That includes BM. Most men who are 8+ inches long are above average.

This means more or less, stories about having a 13 inch monster penis are false. Yes, some men are growers (grow longer when erect) and some men are showers (same size flaccid and erect) but men on average aren’t huge.

Fact: The vagina is no more than 4-6 inches long when stimulated on average. Depth varies per woman.

So those so called monster penises? Yes, the vagina can expand to accommodate a larger-sized penis but it can be painful. But then, given the average size of a penis, BM on average DON’T have a huge penis like they say.

Anyway, that’s just some very basic biology. BM are priding themselves in having a penis that is abnormal and has a more than 50% chance of being painful.

What exactly does BM get from being famous for their penises? Non-BWs seem to flock to them because of those stories, enabling BM to enter IR relationships. BWs claim that it’s the reason why they won’t leave the “bruthas” for men of other races. It’s an ego boost for men who many times, can’t and won’t compete with non-BM on their level with normal things. Non-BM compete on familial wealth (how old/new is your money? what did you do to gain your money so I can take that information and make more money than you), jobs (working for that promotion), wives (my wife is prettier/smarter/classier/more accomplished than yours), families (my children are here, there, everywhere). It can be friendly, it can be fierce but it enables the men to have something to keep striving for. I’ve been around non-BM of every race from the different social classes and from the poorer to the wealthier, most of them were competing to move ahead and/or stay ahead.

Black men try to enter this race by saying they have bigger penises than men of other races. This shows how deranged and juvenile the BC is because while other cultures and races compete over things that ultimately BUILD their race/culture, penis size drags down the culture. American culture is sex-obsessed and the BC is in many ways more sex-obsessed than the general culture. Not excusing rock and other kinds of music but rap and r&b are basically preoccupied with ways of characterizing sex and the BM penis as vulgarly as possible. Then add in the hood novels and it gives the general culture the rightful view that the BC is focused only on sex, mainly the BM’s penis.

Then on the other hand, penis size isn’t everything. Good sex is more than just having a man thrust into you with his penis, it has to do with good foreplay, understanding between the two of you of what turns you on, etc. Many BM I’ve found in RL and online believe that the be all end all is their penis and screwing you as soon as they could. Foreplay was the means to an end (true for all men), something to be rushed through so they could start sticking you as soon as possible. Then, if you didn’t get satisfaction, it was your fault.

It’s sad that BM have so much tied up in being perceived as having a huge penis. Because, in the end, your penis can be big but that doesn’t make you a man. And many BM know that they fail the common tests of being a man and this is their way of evading reality. Sooner or later though, reality shows up and its not pretty.



  1. Sure, I’ll link to you. Great blog…and I like your arguments in this entry (I have to go to bed now, but I’ll catch up with the other entries when I have time).

    I find it incredible that so many African-American Black men speak so much of their penis. Not even Black men from other cultures are so penile-focused. It’s bizarre, juvenile, and simultaneously sad and silly. I sometimes see them having conversations with non-Black racists, and the racists will brag all about their achievements, and these AA men will respond, “Well, I have a big penis.” That’s a pretty pathetic thing on which to stake all one’s pride in – especially considering it’s not even true.

    It was a myth created by slavemasters back in the days of American slavery to dehumanize and create fear…and today you have them actually taking pride in being walking dildos rather than getting educated, striving for success, caring for their families and then saying proudly, “This woman is in my life because I’ve worked hard to be a great man.” It’s a shame.

    I told an AA man who was bragging once that a big penis won’t put food on the table or pay the bills…so I require far more in a man than that before I think of him as a man and he captures my interest. He was so shocked and filled with disbelief. Then he accused me of being a lesbian…I guess since I actually choose a life partner with sense instead of based ONLY on sexual attraction – and didn’t fall to worship at the Black phallus, lol – there’s no way I could have been straight. Just sad.

    Comment by Woman of Valor — October 16, 2009 @ 3:21 am

  2. you’ll like this link, it goes exactly w/ what you’re saying…

    Comment by sky — October 26, 2009 @ 9:06 pm

  3. Hi Time to Keep it Real,
    I have recently read your posts over at CW’s thought I would come over to your blog and check it out. Read a little of the article about the Black men penis size issues etc.. interesting. Great point to be made to fellow black women who still cannot get beyond this MYTH. Please understand ladies that that is all it is..just a myth.
    Please remember that I am not in anyway down playing men of any, white, asian,asian-Indian..all men have that one-eyed snake in their pants. Let us all understand that no man has a monopoly on penis size.

    Comment by MsMellody — October 29, 2009 @ 11:51 am

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